Contrary to what some people think, likeability is not about trying to become a professional people-pleaser, or trying to be all things to all people.
What makes likeable people relationally intelligent is revealed in a person’s ability to evoke favorable feelings in their "audience" (that is, the person they’re in relationship with), in order to produce a positive outcome that serves others well.
Whether people are leading a team at work, at a party with friends, or living their ordinary day-to-day lives, what likeable people do best is establish authentic connections with people that make others feel valued and cared about.
From: Saccone, S. (2009). Relational intelligence: how leaders can expand their influence through a new way of being smart. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
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